bangsandwhimpers

bangsandwhimpers

Welcome to you , dearest reader

You have stumbled upon an almanac encompassing incredible, hilarious and dreadful dalliances spanning ten years and counting

Some are bangs, some are just whimpers: it’s all here in probably way too much detail

Pull up your chaise longue, extend your legs, take off your pants and mix a drink of your choice

cumming next on

bangs and whimpers

  • Breast

    I go for a screening, this time in a mobile unit in a car park. It is almost laughable except it isn’t. I am early because there is no waiting room, no screen, no loo to visit first. I open… more ›

  • The Italian

    The photos are unmistakably me; completely naked. I’m on my bed: the covers familiar, the artwork in the background. Definitely my bedroom. One of me from the side: hair tied up, hands covering my face. And then three more explicit… more ›

  • On Celibacy

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  • The virtual sub

    He’s got a fairly vanilla profile on the site, but his persistence pays off and despite thinking I’m more interested in another guy that week, he wins me over somehow. Oh yeah, the original guy disappeared. His politeness and keenness… more ›

  • The suck

    One of his kinks is wanting me to breastfeed him; I’m on holiday when this revelation appears and on the beach I sit and fantasise about it. My knickers are soaked and I’m shocked at how wet I’ve got. A… more ›

  • The lunch hour

    I’m at work, and it’s a packed, stressful, meeting heavy day. I already feel overwhelmed. But underneath my rather professional black Cos dress I am wearing a red bordello bra and matching thong. Tights, because who can wear suspenders outside… more ›

  • The accountant

    We’ve been chatting for a month but haven’t met yet because both of us have holidays. It’s frustrating but we keep up the momentum. He’s from a site let’s call young men depot. My expectations are ground level, possibly basement.… more ›

  • 15-minute man

    It’s been 10 years my notes tell me. I don’t even know his real name. He texts out of the blue and I fob him off for a week but eventually succumb. I’m nervous. It’s been 10 years. His face… more ›

  • The Graduate

    He was way too young when we met, I was a staff member , he was a student. His arrogance was intoxicating- I was scared of him at first. He was larger than life both in physicality and voice. He… more ›

  • The Hedge Fund Manager / The VJ

    It’s about a month since I last heard from him. I know this because I cancelled on him because I had such bad period cramps. It’s a weird set of messages: HFM: “Hey” B&W: “hey who is this “ HFM:… more ›